Problems at School? How to Handle the Top 4 Issues

By Carole Banks

At some point as a parent, you will likely be faced with the dreaded email from your child’s teacher telling you that your kid has crossed the line and that you need to come in for another conference—or the principal will call to tell you that your teen has missed the last week of school.

Leave discipline for acting out at school to school officials—don’t punish your child twice.

Maybe you’ve discovered that your child’s grades have plunged from acceptable to barely passing. What’s a parent to do? Carole Banks, MSW addresses the top four school emergencies parents struggle with the most.

1. Acting out in school

When your child acts out in school, it can be worrisome, frustrating and embarrassing. On top of the actual misbehavior, you fear that he’ll make a bad name for himself—that his reputation as a troublemaker will follow him from grade to grade. You may also feel judged—and blamed—by teachers and other parents for what your child does at school.

Some kids act out when they’re feeling left out or left behind. Make sure that your child is capable of doing the class work he is being asked to do, for example. Being behind (or ahead of) the class can create boredom, frustration, and anxiety—which may lead some kids to act out verbally or physically.

2. Dropping Grades

If your child’s grades are dropping, rule number one is to become an investigator. In other words, really find out what’s going on with your child. Is he having problems at home or with other kids at school? Is he having a tough time adjusting to middle school or high school? Are his study habits poor—and can you work on that together? For some kids, learning disabilities and medical problems may play a role. And for still others, drug and alcohol use may be the cause of falling grades. The main thing for you to do is find out the “why” and then come up with a plan to help your child. Here are some steps you can take immediately:

Meet with your child’s teacher: Call your child’s teacher and ask for a meeting. Tell her what you are seeing at home—and then ask what she has observed in the classroom. Ask her for any ideas she might have to help your child get back on track.

3. “I hate my teacher!”

Every so often, your child will have a teacher with whom he just can’t seem to get along. Sometimes it’s a simple personality conflict; other times, your child is having difficulty responding to authority. I think that the very first thing to do for your child in this situation is validate how he feels. Don’t agree with him and say, “Yeah, you’re right; your teacher is a jerk.” When you undermine the teacher’s authority, you are giving your child permission to disrespect her. On the other hand, you should allow your child to share with you what it’s like in class. Don’t tell him he’s wrong or that he shouldn’t feel a certain way. Once your child has been heard, he’ll be more receptive to hearing your ideas about what he can do to make the situation better.

4. Skipping school

If your child is skipping school—either playing sick or skipping out of classes—again, you first need to investigate and find out why. Is your child failing, being bullied, under the influence of alcohol or drugs, or does he have physical problems? Some kids develop anxiety around going to school; they can have stomach aches or headaches as a result. Younger kids might cling to parents and cry. A lot of kids will say they’re sick in order to avoid school because they have anxiety about it. If there’s an anxiety issue at play, a visit to your child’s pediatrician to determine whether counseling is in order might be your best course of action. A skilled counselor can gently get your child over the hump and teach them ways of coping with their nervousness around school. So the reason why your child is missing school chronically needs to be understood so it can be resolved. For example, if your child is being bullied, you will need to work with the school to make sure your child is protected and that it stops.

It’s no secret that failing to attend school can lead your child or teen to become involved in risky behaviors, especially if he is not supervised consistently at home. If your child skips school chronically, you may have to involve community services and ask them to address the underlying reasons for school truancy. The juvenile justice system does not like the idea of kids skipping school and loitering around town, so there may be hope there. You might call up your local police department and say, “I can’t get my child to go to school. Are there any resources available in this community to help me get him back on track?”

The Independent, July 19, 2016

UNIT XI

Richard Gordon is the pen name used by Gordon Ostlere (born Gordon Stanley Ostlereon 15 September 1921), an English surgeon and anesthetist. As Richard Gordon, Ostlere has written numerous novels, screenplays for film and television and accounts of popular history, mostly dealing with the practice of medicine. He is best known for a long series of comic novels on a medical theme beginning with Doctor in the House, and the subsequent film, television, radio and stage adaptations. His “The Alarming History of Medicine” was published in 1993, and he followed this with “The Alarming History of Sex”.

          Gordon worked as an anesthetist at St. Bartholomew's Hospital and later as a ship's surgeon and as assistant editor of the British Medical Journal. He has published several technical books under his own name including “Anesthetics for Medical Students” (1949), later published as Ostlere and Bryce-Smith's “Anesthetics for Medical Students” in 1989; “Anesthetics and the Patient” (1949), and “Trichlorethylene Anesthesia” (1953).

           In 1952, he left medical practice and took up writing his “Doctor” series. Here are the most popular of his twelve “Doctor” books: “Doctor at Sea”, “Doctor at Large”, “Doctor in Love”, “Doctor and Son», «Doctor in Clover”, “Doctor in the Nude”, “Doctor in the Swim”, “Doctor on Toast”, “Doctor on the Brain”, “Doctor on the Boil”.

 Doctor in the House

Simon Sparrow arrives at St. Swinthin's Hospital to begin 5 long years of study in order to become a doctor. From his first day, it's obvious that the studious and somewhat inexperienced Sparrow is going to have a series of humorous adventures. He has some difficulty findings lodgings where the landlady's daughter isn't out to seduce him. He's finally taken in by two fellow students, Richard Grimsdyke and Tony Benskin, old hands who didn't pass their exams the first time around. Aside from the normal trials and tribulations of being medical students - in this case in the form of senior physician Sir Lancelot Spratt - Simon has had little luck in the romance department. His chums talk him into going out with nurse Joy Gibson but Simon isn't keen. Love is often found in the strangest places. As the years go by, Simon becomes a quite competent doctor must along with his pals, has to face the hurdle of final exams.